I’m an avid collector of Tarot decks, if I see a deck and I like it, I will buy it. It’s not a cheap hobby by any stretch of the imagination, and some of the older decks I take a fancy to can be quite considered purchases. That being said I am thinking about liquidating the decks that I don’t use or do not relate to so well, there are quite a few of those, purchases that didn’t quite turn out the way that I had hoped they would. Even though they don’t work sometimes I have problems letting go of decks, It makes me possessive and collectors greed is not a pretty thing. I have sold decks before only to repurchase a copy a while down the road. Crazy.
The reason for this is to provide some funding to update this site which is turning out to be a creative focus for me right now, I’d like to upgrade to the professional version so I can get some content protection, I am very wary that some folks are quite happy to ‘borrow’ other peoples ideas, and reuse their pictures. I’m not precious but these are mine. The pictures are of my life, local views, and loves, they aren’t really for anyone but me. I know they are on a public website, but I feel you are in here you are in my domain, quite literally. Maybe this is just something I am worrying about for no reason. I think for me to upgrade this would be costing in the region of £200, this isn’t cheap really. But it does bring other services with it, and higher levels of content. Much as I hate to admit it, I might let my other site regress back to a basic level as I hardly use any of the functions provided by the high level membership, will this turn out to be the same.
I do wonder thought, if I will ever use the full functionality of this site lol, do I have enough ideas to keep on writing regularly? Or will I shortly pull one of my destruction stints and remove everything? My inner censor/critic often comes out and decides that nothing I write is worthy of publication. I hate that guy, he’s such a dick, (pardon my french) he takes it upon himself to decide what I have to say is unimportant. And while it may not be important, these are my words and my thoughts, and Im allowed to have them. I am allowed to record them here for anyone to read.
Im going to try to resist this destruction happening again, wish me luck. Let me know if you have a similar critic that makes you wish to remove writing or destroy your own journal? Maybe its just me but somehow I think now. And I think its understandable, I am fearful of people judging me but at the same time I also don’t really care what people think, which is very odd sounding but it is the way it is.