About LouLouTarot – I am a long time lover of the Tarot and have built this wee place in order to share some of my thoughts and feelings about the magical artefact that is the Tarot. I am going to attempt to write blogs regularly, hopefully at least one a week but I guess we will see how that goes 🙂
I love the 2 of Disks image in the Crowley Thoth Tarot, the crowned Ouroboros serpent, wrapped around in a figure of 8, lemniscate infinity symbol. I even have a print of the card on my bedroom wall that’s how much I love it. The only other card I have on the wall is the Princess of Disks (I really like her as well!)
The colours, pinky purples, blues and black, and the imagery of the card are really appealing to me but what does it mean?
The twos are traditionally seen as the beginning of something. In the Disks case, this means the beginning of manifestation in the realm of the physical (Disks are Earth). The symbol also means balance. It’s that tipping point when an idea starts to become an actual thing. The thought gets expressed on the paper. You gather the tools, materials and start the job. The planning stage might need revising at some stage but for now it’s down to business. It’s about circles of birth and death, growth and change. When you start anything there could be wobbles – hence the need for balance, you don’t learn to ride a bicycle without a wee scrape here and there. Be ready for setbacks, but be ready for set forwards as well. (set-forwards I just made that up did you notice?)
In the Thoth deck, this card is titled ‘Change’, and creation (with its twin destruction) is the ultimate change in our worlds. Sometimes we need to stop and take stock of things. Sometimes we need to stop or destroy ideas. But with this card, it is time to move again, time to stop stopping, stagnating, and let what needs to flow, flow. Change is infinite like the Ouroboros that eats its own tail eternally, it is constantly renewing itself as it destroys itself.
What needs renewing for you just now? What ideas are you having that you need to act to bring into physically manifestation? What does the two of disks mean to you?
This weeks card of the Week is Judgement – or as it’s called in the Crowleyverse “Aeon”.
Traditionally the judgement cards depicts the dead rising from their graves to the Angels call on Judgement Day. To me, it’s always been quite a mysterious card, with its Christian symbolism that doesn’t quite translate to my mindset, and actually, what does it mean to a non-Christian? It’s about accountability on one level, and the next stage of your journey. You have to understand and accept your past to face the future honestly, accepting (and atoning for)your past actions is hard and brings to birth a new you.
Crowley redefined this card when he made his deck and declared this concept of judgement (the second death, hell etc) abrogate. The card Crowley created he called ‘Aeon’ after his belief that we have entered a new age – the age of Horus… a time in which humanity will move away from the sacrificial and damnation of the old gods of Christianity, Judaism or Islam. In Crowley’s theories there have been 3 ages in human history – that of Isis (the mother), Osiris (The Father), and finally now Horus the Child. The new age brings about a change where we move away from the paternal and maternal influences of the past, it the age where we can take our rightful place as adults in the universe.
So though I do believe this card is about rebirth, awakening, and to an extent ‘judgement’ but not in the traditional fashion. Maybe awakening to the fact there is no Judgement or second death (hell etc) and to a large extent, you are free to worship, or not as you choose.
Depression isn’t pretty, it invades every sector of a persons life souring the things that once brought joy making them a source of torment rather than pleasure. Instead of seeing the joy of your beautiful tarot collection, you see the money spent, or the decks you couldn’t connect with. It’s a horrible monster that distorts your view of the good that does actually surround you.
I’ve battled with a form of PTSD on and off for a few years, mostly I am quite well, but anxious/stress panic moments occur and times when I feel like a failure, at these times I have what I call safety checks I have to perform. These feeling do always eventually invade my relationship with the tarot, making it seem foolish or futile. It makes just living hard, let alone anything else.
I think a lot of my problems stem from a childhood that was slightly chaotic, I have fairly low self-esteem. I keep trying to build myself up, without sounding bigheaded. I am good at tarot, I’m good at lots of stuff. And so are you.
I have a few tips for taroting when you are feeling this way (I’m not a doctor, please see a doctor – none of this constitutes medical advice).
- Seek professional help, go before things get harder. Talk to friends. CBT cognitive behaviour therapy could be an option.
- Take a break from Tarot if you need to. Don’t do anything rash like flog them on eBay you’ll regret it, put your cards away and concentrate on feeling better about yourself.
- Try and do something that will improve your living conditions, tidy things away, out the rubbish out.
- Live in the now, try some mindfulness – you can download an app from the interwebs. It’s hard but worrying about tomorrow won’t help if you can do something do it.
- Take a walk, take a few. Have a long soak in the bath. Put some happy music/tv on.
- Remember that you are a being of unfathomable power and potential, yes you are.
- Try to being thankful. Work on a list of the good things that you see.
- Remember this is a chemical or hormonal imbalance, it’s not you yourself
- Treat yourself as you would treat a friend feeling similar, put yourself to be bed early and rest, eat good food. Speak kindly and gently.
- Speak to your doctor, yes I know I said it already, but I’m a nag.
I have just started re-reading Mary K.Greers awesome Tarot workbook “Tarot for yourself”. It’s an excellent way to work with the tarot to take the your knowledge up a step, and to apply it to your own life. Its still in print and well worth picking up to work through. I must admit early in my tarot career, if you’d call it that, I was very lazy daisy about the followthrough when working with kind of book. I think you need to set yourself the challenge to see these things to the end!
Anyway I thought it would be fun to blog some of the exercises as I do them. The first section asks you to answer some questions about your current understanding of Tarot and what you want to gain from the process of working with the book.
What is the Tarot?
The tarot is a set of 78 cards that are structured in a particular way. It is split into two halves, the first 22 are known as major arcana (these are archetypal cards, representing major influences affecting the person) followed by the 56 cards of the Minor arcana ( representing the more of the day to day variety of events)
The minor arcana split into 4 suits of 14 cards, from Ace to 10 followed but a Page, Knight,
Queen and King.
What is the purpose of the tarot cards?
These cards are used to explore thought, ideas and influences that are around a person at that given point in time. I think the tarot is a mirror of the current circumstance. I do think you can also catch glimpses of the future in it also, but this is not fixed.
What do I want to learn from the Tarot?
I want to learn to connect to my subconscious and use it to understand myself, my past (which is quite difficult for me to work with) as a device to aid me in healing
What are you hoping to gain from this workbook?
I am hoping that working through the exercises with give me a structured plan with which to explore the Arcana and to build on the working relationship that I have with it. To deepen and grow in my tarot work.